D/s Dangers and Precautions
Bondage is one of the many little things that almost everyone wants to try at least once, even vanilla (non_D/s) couples. Everything in the world that is flexible has probably been used for bondage from postal twine (yowch!) to silk scarves. Nylons and silk scarves are very often the first things people use for bondage. Nylons because they are available, and silk because it's sexy. Unfortunately, these two items are two of the worst for novices to use.
Silk and nylon both tighten down with resistance which can result in cutting off circulation or pressure on the nerves which run through the wrists and ankles. This means that bondage which was comfortable to start with suddenly becomes dangerously tight. People have suffered PERMANENT NERVE DAMAGE from bondage. Rope bondage, another popular choice, can also cause similar damage. And the cheap handcuffs that so many people use will often continue to tighten after they are applied. So, what then, is the answer?
I recommend that you use leather or fabric cuffs. Cuffs spread the pressure (and most bondagees will pull on the bondage making it tighter and increasing the pressure) and usually are lined which can help prevent chafing. If you buy unlined leather cuffs and find they chafe a bit, it is easy to buy some sheepskin or other cushy material and glue it to the inside of the leather. Cuffs are the best choice for beginning bondage players.
For beginners to bondage, I recommend the cheap, cloth and velcro cuffs sold in most
adult bookstores. They are easy to use, they are wide enough that in most cases they are
Eventually, if you are into bondage, you will decide you want to try standing bondage or especially, suspended bondage. This is a bit more complicated than tying up a prone person. The same safeguards as for general bondage apply. Use rope only if you REALLY know what you are doing. And always check extremities to make sure that circulation and nerve function are not impaired. Nerve damage is always a big danger. In standing and suspended bondage, there is also the danger of light-headedness or fainting. Make SURE in advance that your bottom/sub does not have any medical contraindications such as epilepsy, neuropathy, diabetes, seizure disorder, heart disease, or impaired circulation (to name just a few.) Diabetics and those with neuropathy should be very carefully monitored in bondage, and never subjected to long scenes due to the impaired nerve function that many diabetics suffer. Tying someone with their hands over their heads can bring on dizziness in even the strongest of us. Be really sure that you can get your bottom OUT of the bondage faster than they went into it. This brings us to snap rings or quick release hardware.
Snap rings are hardware fasteners that will open WITH a weight attached. Unlike other
fasteners that require you to remove the weight. They are used in mountain climbing,
boating, and lots of other ways and are readily available in hardware stores. They also
are pricey......it's not unusual for them to cost $3 each, when ordinary fasteners are
$.79. Spend the money. Especially if you are female, there is nothing worse than having a
person who outweighs you in bondage, unconcious, and no way to get them down short of bolt
cutters. The snap rings will drop them immediately. The best procedure is to grasp the
person against you, release the snap ring, and either lower them to the floor, or drop
UNDER them as a cushion. At Feynman's size, I'm not looking forward to having him fall on
me while unconcious, but I'm also not interested in doing his chores while he recovers
from broken bones. You might get winded, but you won't usually BREAK anything from someone
falling on you. I have very large floor cushions that would work to help break a fall.
Something similar is a good idea for your dungeon. We also recommend taking a first aid
course, and CPR. In the bay area, there are two scene friendly people who give kinky first
aid and CPR courses. (If you are in this area, or within reasonable driving distance, let
me know, and I'd be glad to pass on your name and email address to one or the other of
these gentlemen for the next class.) Feynman and I just took one, and we had a lot of fun
One danger of suspended bondage centers on the stress that it places on joints when body weight is put on them in unaccustomed way, in inversion positions, or on joints not usually used for weight. For upright hanging suspension, we recommend special cuffs that support the wrist and forearm, and spread the weight distribution. These often have grab bars in them so that the bondagee can use hand muscles to help give them support. Stress on the wrist itself is to be avoided as much as possible. Inverted bondage often causes people to become dizzy or lightheaded. People with hypertension or heart disease are not good candidates for this form of bondage.
Mostly, as with everything we do, it's a matter of learning HOW to do it correctly and safely, and using common sense. We don't carry bondage cuffs at this time, but you can obtain very nice ones from Mr. S leather in San Francisco. They have a lovely catalog with gorgeous male models. Easily worth the price. It's a big seller every year just for the pictures. One of Domina's favorite places to shop for toys.